Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Being A Stay At Home Mom

When I "met" Jeanne four years ago on a message board, she was part of a women's group that I had also joined.  She had a lot to say about women who stayed home with their families.  Like how she wasn't going to pay their bills, how they'd have no retirement, and how she was a totally great wife with a job and a messy house.  I remember that we didn't quite get the animosity.  No one in the group said you had to be a stay-at-home-mom.  I'm a working mom.  Another woman in our group was a doctor.  We had plenty of working women.  But the way I remember it, there was no explaining that to Jeanne.

So, today, she's put up a Cathy cartoon.  One that describes the surprise of an older mom who's daughter decides to stay home with the kids.  The cartoon in and of itself isn't judgmental of the choice.  Neither is Jeanne's title which simply says this is how she feels about most women in their 20s and 30s.  So, I could be totally reading into it.  But to me it looked like one more judgement against women who choose to stay home.

I never have understood the issue with being a stay at home mom.  I thought the point of women's rights was not to force women out of their homes, but to give them a choice, so that they weren't forced to stay in it if their dream was to do something else.  Lots of women love being with their families and caring for them.  I don't get why that wouldn't be as valid a choice as a job outside the home.

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